I still have no idea where this thing with J is going, but so far so good. I'm trying to enjoy the present moment for what it is instead of getting pre-occupied with the future and what may or may not happen. When I'm not busy letting my fears and insecurities from past relationships (thank you, Patrick, you were a peach) rule my emotions, I'm reminded that God works in our lives for our good and his glory. That said, regardless of where this thing goes, God will use it to do amazing things in my life and I will learn great, invaluable lessons.
J says he's excited to see me too and I think this trip will be really good for us. Having a little face time is exactly what we need to evaluate our feelings and get a better sense of where this is going. I've missed him so much. He has become one of my best friends. Wow. That's scary to say out loud. I'm almost afraid if I do, I might lose it by declaring it too soon. It will be so good to be in the same room with him.
I need a new job.
When I get back from my trip, I've been toying with the idea of getting a job with an airline. It would be perfect. Killer pay (compared to what I make now, at least), great benefits, 401 K, and of course....I could fly for FREE. That right there my friends is what motivates me most. I would love to travel and see the world. Working for an airline would be the easiest, affordable way to do so.
And if things ever become official with J, well, let's just say I'd be making much more frequent trips to OKC.
I really want a place of my own. I'm tired of living with the parents. While the rent is cheap (free), I'm really starting to feel the need for my own space. Aloneness. Yeah, I really want my own place. Is it so wrong to want to be able to walk from the bathroom to the bedroom naked? Can't do that with Dad around.
Also, I need to start exercising more. You would think I'd be strict about it with the upcoming trip and all. Nope.
That's it for now.
Nighty night.
Oh and Patrick? I forgive you. You know not what you did.
